Sunday, March 23, 2003

I just saw Faux News having "The War on Terror" as text accompanying coverage on the war in Iraq. Now, I present to you five phrases you should be using.

1. Schlock and blah. This is not strictly for political parlance. One can use it to describe anything from American Idol contestants to George W. Bush.

2. The coalition of the bribed. Actually, John Kerry called it a "coalition of the bribed, the coerced, the bought and the extorted," but even truncated, it sounds way better (and more accurate) than "coalition of the willing."

3. Axis of Peace. If you're tired of that whole Axis of Weasels crap (I refuse to use the word "meme"), then try this on for size.

4. Free the Kurds. Play taunt the Turks with suggestions of an independent Kurdish state. Stand up for the right of a people to self-government. Mark the conquest of Iraq as a failure if the new regime results in a decrease in the political freedoms of the Kurdish people.

5. Regime Change in 2004. Say it with me. It shall be the war cry of a new election. Buy my bumper stickers.

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